Baby Like Bootlegs...

I’m not 100 percent sure if I’m gonna make these "funny shit my kid does and says” a big part of this blog but here goes, so whatever.

So I was in the supermarket with my kids the other day and we were in the cereal isle and my 5 year old spots some generic brand Cap'n Crunch Berry® type cereal and begs me to get it.



Now, I like them to get whatever they ask for within reason because I’m a cool dad like that. I'm also superficial in some ways (I know it’s a shitty personality trait, but I don’t really care what anyone thinks about it), so I tried to talk her out of it.

Some petty part of my mind was apprehensive about having bullshit cereal in my cart and walking around the store having people look in my cart and think that I have to buy my kids crap cereal ( I know, I’m simple). But the funny shit, and the deciding factor in my decision to get her the cereal was my kid’s theory on what the generic cereal actually was. It went like this:

Daughter: “Daddy, can we get that other Cap'n Crunch® cereal?
Me: “That’s not Cap'n Crunch® baby”
Daughter: “Yes it is, that’s just a different one, like Cap'n Crunch® was sick or something so he asked his friend to be on the front of the box for him.”
Me: “(short pause) OK, bet, lets get it.”

It wasn’t just the cuteness of it (and it might not even be that cute, but it’s my kid so almost everything is cute to me), or how sweet it was that she thought that Cap'n Crunch® was not only a real person but he also has to schedule photo shoots for his cereal box cover appearances. That's awesome.

For a second it reminded me that all those cereals are the same. Like, literally. The big name companies make the same generic bullshit so what do I care. And why do I give a fuck about what people see in my cart?

Also, I had to get it because I needed it as a reminder to tell this story when I got home. I’ve told it like 6 times already. She says funny shit like this all the time.

Anyway, kids are dope.

(If there’s a)Next Time: My Daughters time travel theory, where she thinks photographs come from and her review of Ghostbusters 1&2.