I hate your cd so much

I will begin reviewing CDs in this space in the coming weeks. But I must warn you rappers, singers, kazoo players, and generally sensitive artists that you are starting off with a deficit...because I hate your CD before it even gets in the player. I hate it so much that I met it in the Costa Rican jungle for an underground cage match. I kicked, and then punched your CD in the eye and bit its ear off and suplexed it into the crowd. Then I grabbed the ringside bell and smashed it into your CD's throat and kicked it in the ribs until the ringside security had to taze me and pull me off of your CD. So chew on that before you decide to subject yourself to my review. And with that in mind, I present to you: The Pinky Ring Scale--Tah Dah! Pay close attention, for it shall be your judge.



1 ring -
your cd was ejected out of the player and ground into a fine dust which I put into an airtight flask and rocketed into space in an effort to protect the earth.

2 rings -
I tried to listen to your cd all the way through because there were a few (2) tracks that showed promise but I still decided to take a bite out of it to determine if it tastes better then it sounds.

3 rings -
You're talented, and with some polish your cd would shine. I put all the songs I like from it (3) on a mix cd with some other songs I really like as a buffer to your mediocrity.

4 rings -
I listened to your cd all the way to NY from Bmore with limited skipping. I like you.

5 rings -
I met your cd at a fancy hotel and made sweet ear hole love to it. I stayed all night and asked it to marry me in the morning.








Exeunt!