Pinky Ring Scale: Vol.1

If you're scratching your head and thinking, "What the hell is a "Pinky Ring Scale?", get educated here and read on. We'll wait...

Now that we're all caught up, here goes my inaugural review:



Artist : Brown F.I.S.H.
Title: Bootleg 3 F.I.S.H & Friends...the MIXTAPE

Brown F.I.S.H. is a Baltimore based group comprised of OOH (like the sound the Peanuts gang makes at the sight of the X-mas tree in their annual X-mas special) or as he says, "Big O, Big O, Big H" and Jahiti- a very convincing and deft, fakin' Jamaican. I could be wrong about the fakin', but I doubt it. Rounding out the group is DJ Vertex, who is also our host for the evening and makes most of the beats.

Vertex is an annoying host- let's get that squared away first. His beats are good, but he is way too loud with the obligatory "DJ-ranting-all-over-the-CD thing". It sounds like he's in the bottom of a tin bucket screaming for help. At the midway point you'll feel like he's broadcasting live from your rear molars.

Sometimes I still hear him in my sleep.

The CD itself is a companion to Brown F.I.S.H.'s, F.I.S.H. and Friends DVD

and features snippets of the F.I.S.H and Friends live performance from a few years ago with some spoken word style stuff and some other good artists from BMORE and the surrounding area. OOH is certainly the standout on the CD though.
Anyone that can cleverly weave in J.J. Evans and Bookman from Goodtimes references and make it work, as he does on the joint Cheatin', is good with me. Cheatin', a single worthy ode to infidelity for the grown and sexy set, is locked around an infectious "Girl it ain't cheatin' unless your caught" hook repeated ad nauseum- until your lady friend starts to believe it.

Baltimore City Slicka, a song featuring D.O.G is also a winner. It's a southern fried bass heavy track, courtesy of DJ Vertex, with a chopped and screwed vibe on the hook: I'm a Baltimore City Slicka/Can't control my weed/My liquor/Or my gotdamn zipper...they must be reading my mind. The hook is repeated at different tempos to reinforce the chopped and screwed sorta effect to great success. D.O.G., a Baltimore rapper that mighta sorta had a record deal or something at some point, sounds pretty disinterested in his guest role but OOH goes in with "Fuck a fast car/Bitch I need a van/You think I'm an asshole/I think I'm the man/Shops I tear'em down/Boutiques I tear'em down/ You're such a clown think ballin' is Towson Town..."

A slick sample of the Nutcracker Suite anchors "Let the light..." while DJ Vertex declares it's an ode to balling all over the beginning of the song. Then OOH let's go with "I got a 7 on this arm/Put seven on this wrist/The light hit me right/It looks like X-mas ... And I got my man in here/blingin' like a chandelier/We gone turn this mutha out because I brought my hammer here"

Although OOH shines brightest on this album, his partner Jahiti is definately not a lightweight- just a little under used.
My favorite track, ".45", certainly owes a lot of it's appeal to his rasta vibe on the hook. He also fires up the refrain on "Motion Picure Music" . For a cd this long I would have liked to hear him a few more times as the feature.

Despite my gushing review, there are a few missteps on the album. Besides the relative omission of Jah, it's also a bit lengthy. A couple more A&R sessions could have served them well by trimming the fat off this CD, and making it a classic. Also, when live portions from the DVD are included, it slows the CD down in some places.

They definitely could have used a much better mix down too. Their live shows are great and the bigness (is that a word?) doesn't translate well through the fog of this awkward mix.

I know, I know it's only a mixtape, blah-blah-blah, but a better mix down would have enhanced the already good songs and brought out some of that great live show vibe. To that end, there are several songs on here that could probably go national if they reworked them a bit in my humble opinion.

So *drum roll*, I give these guys 4 pinky rings.





I would have given them 4.5, but we don't do halfsies 'round here. Besides, you can't wear half a ring. Some would say who has 4 pinkies?...... and to you I say, Good Day Sir!

You can check out Brown F.I.S.H. here at your leisure.

As an aside: I think I may have raised (or lowered, depending on how you look at it) the expectations for my reviews with my previous witty, super funny, modest post about the Pinky Ring Scale. Now my peeps are like "We can't wait for you to tear these lame ass cds to shreds". Good citizens please, that's not my intention.

If it's deserving- I'm all in with the kudos and props etc. But if it sucks, God help you. That's pretty much the gist of it; plus it's all opinions anyway.

With that said, I have no idea what I'm reviewing next or what the frequency of my reviews will be because I'm only doing CD's that people send me, hand me, or strongly suggest. So if you're interested in a review hit me up, but bear in mind- if it ain't good, I'll beat it silly.

Exeunt!