Hosting the season premiere is Chris Pratt, who is coming off a huge summer. He's known for comedy, so this should be a breeze. Welcome back SNL!
Our Rating system
Phil Hartman – Comedic gold
Chris Farley – Definitely funny, but
kinda messy
Norm MacDonald – Funny, but not for
everyone
Kristen Wiig – So-so premise saved by
performer.
Tim Meadows – Didn’t hate it, didn’t love
it, dripping with adequatulence
Darrell Hammond – Funny, but overstayed
it’s welcome
Jim Breuer- Crowd pleaser, but a bit
obvious
Robert Downey Jr – Brilliant performer,
not a lot to work with
David Spade – Trying too hard
Janeane Garofalo – Weird weird, not weird
funny
And introducing our new Host Rating Scale;
Drake – Outstanding
Edward Norton – Impressive
Josh Hutcherson – Fine Enough
Charlize Theron – Essentially an Extra
Seth Rogen – Expectation, Unmet
Jim Parsons - Awful
CNN State of the Union – SNL had to
address the NFL, because it’s the biggest story and it’s not going away anytime
soon. But this cold open is a
mess. Aidy was rusty and Roger
Goodell is so nondescript that he’s impossible to lampoon without going over
the top, which is not where the writers went. Kenan and Jay were fine, but this sketch went nowhere.
Rating: David Spade
Monologue – This was a pretty underwhelming monologue. If they wanted to trot out a well worn
monologue type, they should have done the Audience Q&A, rather than the
musical monologue. It was poorly
executed and not all that entertaining.
Rating: Janeane Garofalo
Cialis Turnt – I’m positive that there will be think-pieces
written about the appropriation of Black culture in this sketch. I guess that white people performing
Hip-Hop clichés will never go out of style. A cleverer sketch would have been the same product
name, only it’s marketed to an urban demo. Then you’re making fun of the Big Pharm targeting a specific
demographic, rather than Hip-Hop culture.
Rating: Jim Breuer
He-Man & Lion-O – This sketch was a mess. It had a paper thin premise that wasn’t
explored, in favor of patting crotches.
The sketch goes nowhere. If
the sketch had a high point it’s Aidy Bryant’s horny mom, but that’s a
character she’s accustomed to playing.
And the abrupt ending didn’t help things. Kyle Mooney and Taran Killam deserve better.
Rating: Robert Downey Jr.
Animal Hospital – I enjoyed this sketch last year, so seeing
again was a much needed sign of
hope. Strong and McKinnon do a
great job with their nutty accents and nuttier characters. The sketch builds and delivers. That bit with the turtle was perfectly
executed comedy. It’s a one joke
bit, but they sell it. The ending
was wack.
Rating: Kristen Wiig
Marvel Trailers – This was spot on about how Marvel
is running things and can’t be stopped.
I think I’m most excited for Pam 2: The Winter Pam and Fancy
Ghosts.
Rating: Tim Meadows
Ariana Grande Performance #1 – She sounds a bit hoarse. I really want to spray some
Chloraseptic down her throat, and that’s not a euphemism. I have to say that watching Ariana Grande
perform makes me feel crazy old. I
have zero point of reference for her.
I guess her performance was fine?
Weekend Update – First off, it was brilliant to pair Colin
Jost with Michael Che, because the only person who could make Jost look
comfortable at the desk is someone who’s a complete novice at performing on the
SNL stage. Che needs to find his
rhythm quick, because I feel the viewing audience will be unforgiving. Fortunately Update had a ton of moving
parts this week. Cecily,
unsurprisingly, made an appearance, as did Leslie Jones. I’m happy Leslie Jones is getting to
perform her stand up on Update, because honestly, if you don’t use white guilt
for that, then what are you saving it for? Pete Davidson is completely being set up to succeed. Not only was his bit brilliantly
hilarious, but it was his first show.
I bet John Milhiser, Noel Wells and Brooks Wheelan wish they got a
showcase like that on their first episode. Finally the Cheer Up President Obama bit should be commended
for trying something new on Update.
Flirting – More white people doing Hip-Hop? This one is slightly less offensive,
because it’s not as shallow. Pratt
and Bryant also do a good job of jumping in and out of the rap cadence. Also the premise of two people who are
shy and awkward yet spontaneously jump into rhyming is kind of funny. Still, twice in one episode?
Rating: Kristen Wiig
Bad Boys – I was slayed the first time Bennett and Mooney
did this riff on a 90’s sitcom, which unfortunately didn’t make it to air. But this time was even better, if it
was a bit more grounded. The
establishing shots were just awesome.
The awkwardness in this sketch is to pitch perfect. This one spoke my language.
Rating: Norm MacDonald
NFL Player Introductions – This was a very well executed
sketch. The changes in appearance
were great, as was using utility players like Jones, Jost and Che to fill in
gaps. I do wish they’d gone a bit
bigger and nuttier with the crimes.
Also, Tim Stevens indicted on tax fraud? For shame.
Rating: Norm MacDonald
Ariana Grande Performance #2 – Jay-1 tells me that Ariana Grande
is dating Big Sean, which is weird, because I thought her career was on an
upward trajectory. Whatevs. This song was ok, but I was completely
distracted by The Weeknd’s hairstyle.
I feel like someone should tell him that he’d be respected and acknowledged
as an artist without a hairstyle that seemed constructed strictly for
attention.
Puzzle World 6 – What a garbage sketch to end the show
on. I genuinely tried to detect
the comedy in the sketch and came up with nothing.
Rating: Janeane Garofalo
Final Thoughts: While the highs were high, it was a pretty
brutal episode. It’s a season
premiere, which tempers things, but man, that episode was not that much fun to
sit though.
And in hosting SNL, Chris Pratt is exposed as having few
strengths beyond being charming. I’ve
got to believe that this outing has diminished his stock a smidge, after his
stellar summer. Honestly, for Pratt's rating I've got to give him a Charlize Theron.
But let’s look on the bright side; Pete Davidson had an
impressive debut and Kyle Mooney is going all in with his shorts.
Next week: Sarah Silverman, who was allegedly a SNL
castmember.
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