The BET Awards were on, and I watched them...

So The BET awards happened and I watched it for you. Not because I wanted to, but because I like to engage in dangerous and stupid endurance challenges every now and then.



Ok, so right off top, this New Edition tribute to the Jackson is kinda cool and sad at the same time. They all sound like shit, they killing the dance moves though.

This opening dance number with Jamie Foxx is awkward. The Opening monologue is awkward too, but kinda dope because it's so blatantly freestyled. I wonder what the theme was supposed to be had Jackson not died...



I like how Tyra Banks is giving away the award for "Best Male Athlete" and "Best Male Hip Hop". What the hell is "Best Male Hip Hop"?

Lebron gets best athlete for some reason, apparently Nike is a sponsor and Kobe is still celebrating.

Here comes Lil Wayne to accept the "Best Male Hip Hop", no other nominees were mentioned, but I think they were Rick Ross, Kanye, T.I., and Souljah Boy or someone equally absurd. I love how Lil Wayne says: "None of us in this room wouldn't be here without Michael Jackson." I was gonna make fun of what's at least a triple negative from Wayne, but he has a New Orleans education for goodness sakes.

These awards are officially awful. Its almost as bad as everyone was bitching about on twitter.

Keri Hilson is hot to me. She could definitely get it. I'm not feeling all this dancing. This is my first time seeing her on stage, she shouldn't be dancing this much, this is not a good look for her. If I managed her, I would have her doing something different on stage.

she asking the crowd to sing and they're not. This extra bullshit at the end of her set is wack.

Neo and his giant head are singing a duet of "Lady in my life", which is an awesome song. Very classy moment of a show that dangerously teetering on "Debacle" level foolishness.

This montage of Michael videos of cool.

wow, Keke can really sing.



"Blame It" is a great song, I don't care what anyone says. I don't know why they keep trying to bleep out certain words, they keep missing and it's stupid.

T-Pain's chain is hilarious. Snoop and Travis Barker are here for some reason. I seriously can't imagine or figure out why.

When did Mcdonalds become "black people food"? I'm tired of their commercials. I've never seen a Mcdonalds cashier that happy or helpful or informative.

It's so easy to hate on Soulja Boy but how could you really. Is that nigga even 21? Fuck it, he's doing his thing. I just hate what he represents I guess.

This Chaka Khan bit is hilarious. I'm not even sure if Estelle and Latoya Luckett get the joke. They're giving out 2 awards, without mentioning the other nominees, this is funny.

Beyonce is smoking hot.




I really just wanna smell Jay Z's finger one time...seriously. Beyonce's photo needs to be put in a time capsule so that people in the year 3000 can see it.

"Skank Robbers" was a really funny bit.

I don't know how I feel about this Mary Mary song. Are they using God to sell music or are they using music to sell God? Whatever. At least its a song I can listen to with my kid.

Zoe Saldana came out by herself because Nichelle Nichols is taking a prune dump or fixing her wig or some shit.

Zoe: "Well, we're gonna get started, Nichele is in the bathroom..."

Damn, that is funny.

Wait, Jamie Foxx again? And Ne-yo? Why are they both performing again, It's not like they didn't alr--Holy Shit where did Keith Sweat come from!?

I'm happy for Keith. Oh wow, here comes Guy. And Aaron Hall sounds like shit, but this is still cool in theory. In practice, this is an argument against reunions in general.

I just wanna say for the record that we here at Fish And Spaghetti predicted that New Jack Swing would be the next big revival. Maybe New Jack Swing was suppossed to be the theme if Mike hadn't died? Who knows.

These Housewives of Atlanta chicks are super wack.

I almost didn't recognize Ciarra. She's not even that good a singer. I'm sure BET just asked everyone "Who knows a Michael Jackson songs?"

The treble is up too high on Keyshia Cole's performance. Here comes Monica, poking her into Keyshia Cole's set, I wish they would make out, that would make this show awesome.

Kanye West's walking, breathing accessory is sexy as hell.

Jeremy Piven is hilarious.

Oh, wait NOW they're gonna start mentioning nominees? Why? Forget it. Who cares. This show is a piece of shit.

Look a Beyonce pretending to care about that stupid award.




"Death Of Auto Tune" is that shit. Jay Z just shut down the whole show just now.



Jamie is chilling up top in the shitty seats with the radio contest winners and they're all acting like assholes and he's scolding them and it's funny.

I swear I thought Don Corniellius was dead. Lol, he just said Al Sharpton would fight a brick if he had to. Corniellius is talking so slow, I've almost completely lost interest in the show all together.

I think I'm young enough to not feel bad about fast forwarding through this "The O-Jay's" tribute. Not that I don't like them, i just don't care about them, and I'm not a fan of any of those dudes singing right now. I have to say, it was funny to hear the crowd gasp when Tevin Cambell was mentioned. I thought he was dead too.

Watching Al Sharpton and Joe Jackson dancing to "For The Love of Money" is really apropos.

Here's the Chairwoman of BET, Debra Lee for some odd reason. Hopefully, this means the show's almost over. I mean, it was funny and everything but this is exhausting.

Alicia Keys is a classy broad. I guess.

Her humanitarian award is almost enough to make me forget that she wrecked that ladies marriage. I guess she's the black Angelina Jolie: She's sexy, she's talented, she destroyed a marriage and she's a humanitarian. Nice.

This "Baby Boy" bit they're doing is kinda funny. It's going on for way too long though.

Alright, and here goes, Maxwell to wrap the show up, hopefully, please God.

No wait, here's Drake and Lil Wayne serenading a bunch of 12 year olds, and my DVR just cut the show off. Great.

I heard later that Janet Jackson came out and said something and that Joe Jackson was up there promoting his new label of some crazy, tacky, classless shit. I really wanted to see that though.

Here's a clip of him talking to CNN on the red carpet and I have to say he seems crazy as hell.



So, yeah, that's it.

At the end of the day, there were some hilarious moments, some bad moments, some good moments and some hilariously bad moments that were so bad they were good. And who would have expected anything otherwise from this award show.

By the way, after seeing Keith Sweat, Aaron Hall, New Edition, and Tevin Campbell, I don't know why they didn't just cart Michaels dead body out there too. I mean, since they were already exhuming corpses and everything. I'm just saying.

Goodnight everyone!